Lifted from another forum: top 10 things said

[MikeWaters]

in next yeard TdF.

1. Okay, Oscar and a couple of others off his team need a ride to the next stage. They'll share gas. Can anyone give them a lift?
2. We need 5 more volunteers to give hand-ups at the 2nd feedzone. Is there anyone sober enough out there willing to help?
3. Hey man, can you pin my number? I'm supposed to start my TT in about 10 minutes.
4. Attention: The team wearing the plain Giordana jersies needs to come sign in or they'll be penalized.
5. Okay, the finish line camera isn't working so can some of you in the crowd, who are sober, help pick the top 180 in this flat stage?
6. Wow, these new Chinese bike racers sure are strong. I wonder what they've been doing for training in the last 5 years?
7. Let's put David Millar in the ditch at this next turn. I'm real sick of listening to his b.s. like he's Mr. Model Citizen spokesmodel for us
8. Wow, we averaged 23 mph on that 120 mile stage.
9. Hey, isn't that Sainz standing next to Vino' with the "will work for food" sign?
10. That's it, I'm quitting and going to go play pro soccer or tennis. They get paid a shitload more, work a shitload less and can take whatever they want.