Kids, peer pressure and rude comments

[Archaea]

So playing goalkeep can have its downside and upside. One of the downsides occurs during bad games.

So one of our players was mocking my son for being a stupid dumbass white boy who can't block a shot.

My son is a little bit hard-headed and observed to the kid, who struggles in school, "I may be a stupid dumbass white boy, but I'm smart enough to know you'll be mowing my lawn in few years after I'm done with college."

I smacked his head upside and down, but it shut the kid up, who by the way wasn't shooting any goals nor defending his offensive player.

[il Padrino Ute]

Originally Posted by Archaea

So playing goalkeep can have its downside and upside. One of the downsides occurs during bad games.

So one of our players was mocking my son for being a stupid dumbass white boy who can't block a shot.

My son is a little bit hard-headed and observed to the kid, who struggles in school, "I may be a stupid dumbass white boy, but I'm smart enough to know you'll be mowing my lawn in few years after I'm done with college."

I smacked his head upside and down, but it shut the kid up, who by the way wasn't shooting any goals nor defending his offensive player.

You did the right thing by letting your boy know it was wrong to say that, but dangit, some kids just need to be put in their place.

[creekster]

My 9 year old came home the other day with a citation from the princiapl. He had apparently hurled a grape at some girl whpo was on the nearby track and hit her in the head. SHe was not hurt but was scared becasue she thought it was a rock. My wife wanted me to talk to him but I declined, as I was impressed he had thrown a grape with such velocuity and accuracy that someone thought she'd been pegged with a rock. This is especially true for the 9 year old, as he is not a very aggressive kid and tends to let others have their way with him. Was I wrong?

[SteelBlue]

Originally Posted by creekster

He had apparently hurled a grape at some girl whpo was on the nearby track and hit her in the head.

That's pretty impressive. Really.

[Jeff Lebowski]

Funny story. Sounds like a kid with a quick wit.

Our local high school is notorious for doing this cheer when they are losing a game:

"That's all right, that's OK. You're gonna work for us someday."

The principal gets furious every time they do it.

[Archaea]

Originally Posted by SteelBlue

That's pretty impressive. Really.

I am impressed, none of my kids have that sort of arm. Start him in football now.

[Venkman]

Originally Posted by Jeff Lebowski

Funny story. Sounds like a kid with a quick wit.

Our local high school is notorious for doing this cheer when they are losing a game:

"That's all right, that's OK. You're gonna work for us someday."

The principal gets furious every time they do it.

Let me guess, Timpview?

[Jeff Lebowski]

Originally Posted by Venkman

Let me guess, Timpview?

LOL. Bingo.

[BigFatMeanie]

Originally Posted by creekster

My 9 year old came home the other day with a citation from the princiapl. He had apparently hurled a grape at some girl whpo was on the nearby track and hit her in the head. SHe was not hurt but was scared becasue she thought it was a rock. My wife wanted me to talk to him but I declined, as I was impressed he had thrown a grape with such velocuity and accuracy that someone thought she'd been pegged with a rock. This is especially true for the 9 year old, as he is not a very aggressive kid and tends to let others have their way with him. Was I wrong?

I don't think you were wrong. Some things I will discipline my kids swiftly and severely over. Other things I won't. I'm definitely not one of the "my precious Johnny could never do something bad" type of parents. Kids can and will do naughty things, be disrespectful, etc. The trick is knowing when a boy is just being a boy and when it is behavior that needs to be corrected (not always easy to know).

When I was a kid I picked a huge toadstool mushroom out of our front lawn (living in Solana Beach at the time - a toadstool won't even grow here in Utah - too dry). Our teenage neighbor came driving down the street with his driver-side window open. I hucked the toadstool at his moving car. The toadstool went in the open window, hit him in the side of the head, and exploded into a mushy mess all over him and the car. He immediately turned into our driveway so I took off running. Apparently he knocked on our door and told my dad what I had done. When I finally turned up after hiding, my dad gave me two options:

1. Go over to his house, apologize, and clean out his car
2. Take a whipping with the belt.

I chose the belt. My dad whipped me good because throwing something at a car can be very dangerous. That being said, I think he understood that as a 10 year old boy, I just HAD to throw that toadstool. I deserved the punishment and took it like a man. It was a fair price to pay - to this day I don't regret throwing the toadstool and still derive great satisfaction in remembering that thing explode all over the guy's car.

I think the grape incident is similar. Imagine you are nine years old. You have a grape. You see a girl running. Who wouldn't throw it? It was in his DNA to throw that grape - he just HAD too. Obviously, throwing junk at people can be dangerous so you might want to say something along the lines of "Son, that was a heck of a nice throw - I probably would have thrown it too. Just remember that there are consequences to our actions so be sure to use good judgment and don't do something unless you are prepared to accept the consequences."

[creekster]

Originally Posted by BigFatMeanie

I think the grape incident is similar. Imagine you are nine years old. You have a grape. You see a girl running. Who wouldn't throw it? It was in his DNA to throw that grape - he just HAD too. Obviously, throwing junk at people can be dangerous so you might want to say something along the lines of "Son, that was a heck of a nice throw - I probably would have thrown it too. Just remember that there are consequences to our actions so be sure to use good judgment and don't do something unless you are prepared to accept the consequences."

That is sage advice. Turth be told, I did somethign like this. Becasue he had already gotten in trouble at school (he was very annoyed becasue he had to miss recess) I decided to wait a while before bringing it up. I asked him for a little more info the next day, which he gave me, and it was in fact just a spur of the moment thing, so I told him something like what you said. I tried to explain to my wife how sometimes when the boys do something really stupid and you want to ask "what were you thinking" there is no point in asking, becasue they wern't thinking anything, they just did it, and they could never answer the question.