My boy is 2 1/2 and doesn't talk.

[marsupial]

Originally Posted by TripletDaddy

In all my life, I have never met adults who couldn't walk, talk, eat with utensils, or use the bathroom.

I don't think Levin's wife is being an alarmist. I would definitely take him to a doctor. There are so many different things that could be preventing him from talking. And often help is free with early childhood development programs until they turn three, so there is no point in continuing with the wait-and-see approach.

[FarrahWaters]

Originally Posted by Levin

My wife is really worried, but I've taken a very laid back approach. But now that we've hit the downhill approach to 3, I want to be more proactive, or at least just talk to a professional. We haven't taken him to a doctor or anything for his delayed speech. I don't like parental alarmism, and I think kids should be given space and patience to develop, with loving encouragement. But my wife has been chafing at my "I'm not worried" statements, and I am now curious why he may not be talking.

He makes good eye contact, plays well, likes physical affection . . . but he can't say a single word except "yah" and "mo" -- his "yes" and "no." Not a single other word. He won't try to make the sounds when we have worked with him.

Internet tells me there are a host of reasons for delayed speech. We're going to take him to his pediatrician, but have any of you guys or gals had any experience with this?

I'm tired of telling my wife that Einstein didn't talk until he was four.

I also believe that kids should develop at their own pace, but it sounds like your wife has felt something is wrong early on. I wouldn't ignore that feeling. Definitely go to a hearing center and have his hearing testing. Any other action you take has to be preceded by them ruling out a hearing problem. I'm surprised his Pediatrician hasn't suggested some sort of interventional therapy already.

Texas has a program called ECI (Early Childhood Intervention) that help kids under the age of 3 with developmental delays. I'm sure wherever you live has a similar program. Your pediatrician should know.

I've read a book called "The Late Talker" http://www.amazon.com/Late-Talker-Wh...5781849&sr=8-1
In this book, the author mentions that often parents wait a long time to seek help, because of the "Einstein didn't talk until he's 4" line. (btw, some think that Einstein might have had Asperger's). It's hard to accept that your child might need outside assistance. It's best to go into it calmly, with an open mind. A lot of times, nothing is wrong, and boys are known to develop speech later than girls. On the other hand, it's in your child's best interests to explore other causes.

How does your son communicate? If he is getting frustrated, I recommend the Signing Time dvds that teach ASL. They also have a show on PBS every week, but I think the DVDs do a good job starting off with the basic signs needed for every day life. Contrary to what some people think, learning sign language does not delay speech, it can actually help facilitate it.

Sorry for the long post. Good luck!

[Levin]

Originally Posted by FarrahWaters

I also believe that kids should develop at their own pace, but it sounds like your wife has felt something is wrong early on. I wouldn't ignore that feeling. Definitely go to a hearing center and have his hearing testing. Any other action you take has to be preceded by them ruling out a hearing problem. I'm surprised his Pediatrician hasn't suggested some sort of interventional therapy already.

Texas has a program called ECI (Early Childhood Intervention) that help kids under the age of 3 with developmental delays. I'm sure wherever you live has a similar program. Your pediatrician should know.

I've read a book called "The Late Talker" http://www.amazon.com/Late-Talker-Wh...5781849&sr=8-1
In this book, the author mentions that often parents wait a long time to seek help, because of the "Einstein didn't talk until he's 4" line. (btw, some think that Einstein might have had Asperger's). It's hard to accept that your child might need outside assistance. It's best to go into it calmly, with an open mind. A lot of times, nothing is wrong, and boys are known to develop speech later than girls. On the other hand, it's in your child's best interests to explore other causes.

How does your son communicate? If he is getting frustrated, I recommend the Signing Time dvds that teach ASL. They also have a show on PBS every week, but I think the DVDs do a good job starting off with the basic signs needed for every day life. Contrary to what some people think, learning sign language does not delay speech, it can actually help facilitate it.

Sorry for the long post. Good luck!

Thanks so much for your thoughts. Our son communicates by walking up to us, grabbing our hand, and taking us to what he needs or where he needs to go. He doesn't point or grunt. We ask him quite a few questions throughout the day about his needs, and we get his "yahs" or "mos."

Our 4-year old loved Signing Time, and our youngest has watched it, but he won't try making the signs. It's in line with him not trying to sound out words. When we try to work with him on a single word, to have him repeat, he won't even try making a sound.

Thanks for the reference to the book. I'll definitely order it.

[landpoke]

Originally Posted by MikeWaters

You definitely need to get plugged in so that your son can start working with speech therapy.

Also, how did the doc check his hearing? Looking into his ears is not checking his hearing.

This was kind of my point. With my son a simple glance in the ears wouldn't show anything. It's been a few years, but as I recall it took something like this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tympanogram to figure out that he did indeed have gunk behind his eardrum.

I was in your camp when this all came down: don't worry, milestones are the product of over-competitive parenting etc. I'm still mostly in that camp, but occasionally something is wrong.

[TripletDaddy]

Originally Posted by marsupial

I don't think Levin's wife is being an alarmist. I would definitely take him to a doctor. There are so many different things that could be preventing him from talking. And often help is free with early childhood development programs until they turn three, so there is no point in continuing with the wait-and-see approach.

I agree. You omitted the first part of my quote. But once docs have checked him out and either put him on a program or declared him to be fine, there is nothing extremely out of the ordinary for a 3 year old to be overly shy. It happens.

Again, do you know many adults that can't talk?

[marsupial]

Originally Posted by TripletDaddy

I agree. You omitted the first part of my quote. But once docs have checked him out and either put him on a program or declared him to be fine, there is nothing extremely out of the ordinary for a 3 year old to be overly shy. It happens.

Again, do you know many adults that can't talk?

No, but I am sure there are many in the deaf community. I do know an adult who has speech problems but otherwise appears to have a normal mental capacity. It makes me sad to hear him talk because I am sure that early intervention would have worked wonders. However, he grew up in rural Mississippi where I imagine that sort of help was not available to him at the time.

[SeattleUte]

Originally Posted by TripletDaddy

Again, do you know many adults that can't talk?

Why do you keep saying this? Of course there are adults who can't talk.

[TripletDaddy]

Originally Posted by SeattleUte

Why do you keep saying this? Of course there are adults who can't talk.

Again, once the docs check the kid out and find no other developmental delays, then comparisons with the deaf or mentally disabled are out the window.

The kid may just be shy. Don't freak out.

I have never advocated against therapy. I think it is wise to do this. I am saying that if your doctors are telling you that your kid is fine, he is likely fine. Levin's fact pattern is not that extreme. If the kid were 5 years old and not speaking, then I could see. Levin also seemed to indicated that they have already considered autism, so that seems to be out the window, too.

Parents get obsessed with milestones when in reality, there is no need to be. At what age did LeBron James start to walk? It was pointed out earlier that Einstein didnt speak until he was a bit older. I support Levin in his non-paranoia. I also support him in taking his child for speech therapy if that is what the docs feel is best. But paranoia in the face of medical counsel that tells you that your son is actually ok seems unwarranted. Not saying Levin is paranoid, btw. I am speaking generally.

[MikeWaters]

What evidence do we have that Levin said his doctor checked for developmental delays?

[TripletDaddy]

We have none. Which is why I have been saying that "once" the docs have checked, then move along.

But I would assume that Levin has been taking his baby in for the regular checkups since birth...when they continue to check basics like hearing, eating, responsiveness, etc.

Lvein hasnt indicated that his child cannot perform basic tasks, reason, listen, etc. He just said that his kid is shy.