How do you feel about coercive prayers?

[RedHeadGal]

Here's the set-up: as usual, this comes from an 8 year-old context because, as I've mentioned, I teach the 8 year-old class, so that's the perspective of my religious experience each Sunday.

There are usually about 4-5 kids in class, and we have two prayers, opening and closing. I prefer to ask for volunteers, but typically there are only 2 willing volunteers. Generally, I stick with those, but after a few months have gone by and "Billy" has never prayed once, I just skip the volunteer bit and ask "Billy" directly to pray. Billy "doesn't want to" but does anyway (all I did after he expressed his lack of desire was to look at him for a second--I was thinking about what to do next when he proceeded to start).

Well, I felt his pain because I also hate to be coerced into praying in public, but I always do it also when asked. And yet, these are also children, so maybe the have to learn to just get used to it. It's bothered me ever since.

Leaving aside those who "can't" pray for reasons such as excommunication, does it bother you how regularly we coerce people to pray at meetings? Does it make a difference if it's children or adults?

[MikeWaters]

Originally Posted by RedHeadGal

Here's the set-up: as usual, this comes from an 8 year-old context because, as I've mentioned, I teach the 8 year-old class, so that's the perspective of my religious experience each Sunday.

There are usually about 4-5 kids in class, and we have two prayers, opening and closing. I prefer to ask for volunteers, but typically there are only 2 willing volunteers. Generally, I stick with those, but after a few months have gone by and "Billy" has never prayed once, I just skip the volunteer bit and ask "Billy" directly to pray. Billy "doesn't want to" but does anyway (all I did after he expressed his lack of desire was to look at him for a second--I was thinking about what to do next when he proceeded to start).

Well, I felt his pain because I also hate to be coerced into praying in public, but I always do it also when asked. And yet, these are also children, so maybe the have to learn to just get used to it. It's bothered me ever since.

Leaving aside those who "can't" pray for reasons such as excommunication, does it bother you how regularly we coerce people to pray at meetings? Does it make a difference if it's children or adults?

what if Billy has been asked not to pray or take the sacrament for a few months by the Bishop?

[RedHeadGal]

And last year another kid flat out refused. So I told his parents, and he volunteered after that. But I didn't feel good about myself.

[RedHeadGal]

Originally Posted by MikeWaters

what if Billy has been asked not to pray or take the sacrament for a few months by the Bishop?

yeah, I hear that's really common among 7 year olds, who don't even take the sacrament "for real" and who are supposedly not accountable. Maybe I should draw the line at their 8th birthday and leave a little wiggle room for disciplinary action/counsel.

[YOhio]

Does Billy participate in class otherwise?

[MikeWaters]

if you are teaching an adult class you should be sensitive about asking people to give prayers, because some of them, for their own spiritual health, have been instructed by local leaders to not pray. Or put another way, they are forbidden to pray.

It makes for moments of awkwardness.

[SeattleUte]

Originally Posted by RedHeadGal

Here's the set-up: as usual, this comes from an 8 year-old context because, as I've mentioned, I teach the 8 year-old class, so that's the perspective of my religious experience each Sunday.

There are usually about 4-5 kids in class, and we have two prayers, opening and closing. I prefer to ask for volunteers, but typically there are only 2 willing volunteers. Generally, I stick with those, but after a few months have gone by and "Billy" has never prayed once, I just skip the volunteer bit and ask "Billy" directly to pray. Billy "doesn't want to" but does anyway (all I did after he expressed his lack of desire was to look at him for a second--I was thinking about what to do next when he proceeded to start).

Well, I felt his pain because I also hate to be coerced into praying in public, but I always do it also when asked. And yet, these are also children, so maybe the have to learn to just get used to it. It's bothered me ever since.

Leaving aside those who "can't" pray for reasons such as excommunication, does it bother you how regularly we coerce people to pray at meetings? Does it make a difference if it's children or adults?

In general, there's nothing wrong with making kids do stuff that's good for them, in an appropriate way. In fact, it's wrong not to.

The question is posed as if it's an adult being coerced, however. They're not the same as children.

[BlueHair]

I think prayers should be arranged before class/meeting. To put someone on the spot is rude. A few years ago I was asked to pray at a work staff meeting (yes, I live in Utah County). I declined and it made for a very awkward moment for everyone in the meeting.

[BlueHair]

What about coercing someone with a prayer? During prayer with your wife, you could ask God to soften your wife's heart and allow you hang out with your buddies more.

My dad uses coercion when he prays. My parents invited us over for dinner and during the food blessing my dad says, "Please bless BlueHair that he will desire to take part in the blessings of church activity". I almost laughed out loud.

[Goatnapper'96]

Originally Posted by BlueHair

What about coercing someone with a prayer? During prayer with your wife, you could ask God to soften your wife's heart and allow you hang out with your buddies more.

My dad uses coercion when he prays. My parents invited us over for dinner and during the food blessing my dad says, "Please bless BlueHair that he will desire to take part in the blessings of church activity". I almost laughed out loud.

Maybe your pops went inactive for a period and your mamma reinstituted the Laurel Prom Night Thigh Clamp?

Dude just wants you to get laid!