J. Beck's CES Fireside

[BYU71]

Originally Posted by exUte

or based on a bias you hope is true so that it backs up your criticisms?

Do you ever quit complaining about the Church and it's leaders?

The guy holds and has held the position of scoutmaster in his Ward. Since you are so good at focusing on the postive, focus on that for awhile.

[ERCougar]

Originally Posted by NorCal Cat

For the record, I will post my sincere opinion on this matter.

I firmly believe that whenever financially possible, one parent should stay home with the kids on a full time basis, at least until all the kids are in elementary school. I also believe that women are innately better equipped to do this. I know this is the case with my wife and I, that's for sure.

I also believe that if the husband is capable, that there's nothing inherently wrong with him being a stay at home dad, while mom earns the bread. Especially if mom is in a position to make a significantly higher amount of money than dad.

What I don't understand is when a couple CHOOSES to both work full time, instead of having one person home with the kids. I see this as essentially letting someone else raise your kids, because the kids are spending the vast majority of their waking hours with a non-parent. This is not raising a family, but out-sourcing it to someone else. If one of the parents is not willing to stay home with the kids, then don't bother having any.

I'm not sure if Julie Beck would disagree with this.

And if she would, her opinion doesn't matter too much to me, because I feel strongly that God would agree with this.

Oh...except for your last sentence. I'm not sure I'm totally on board with that.

[ERCougar]

Originally Posted by NorCal Cat

In other words...women who know will not choose to use their education pursuing a career, but will use it to be a stay at home mom. The rest of you will burn in hell.

I hope this isn't the message you're really pulling from this talk. I'm guessing you're being facetious.

[ERCougar]

Originally Posted by UtahDan

A very good friend of ours (my wife and me) who has had an exemplary career in the service of her country has remarked to me more than once she fields a large number of comments from other ladies in the ward which are calculated to let her know they are rooting for her to fail. She isn't bothered by it and is about the least sensitive person I know. She just finds it odd.

Not saying sis Beck is doing that, but there does seem to be a fair amount of back biting from some of the full time mom crowd toward the career sisters who have kids. Maybe the word is envy. I don't know.

Are there a lot of career women making similar comments to the stay at home moms that every choice they make has a cost and that they ought to take the eternal view? I suspect no.

I think it is an individual decision.

I think the word absolutely is "envy". In every case that I've seen this kind of backbiting going on.

Maybe that's why I'm not offended by this talk. Anyone who uses it as ammo for judging is really just envious, and I can see that for what it is. Ugly.

[ERCougar]

Originally Posted by MikeWaters

In other words she is 100% convinced that she is right, with no room for those who disagree, and uses strident language. We call these people "mullahs". (note: label doesn't apply to me, despite the fact I am always right)

Except for, at the end, she said it is between God and you.

Very un-mullah if you ask me.

[MikeWaters]

UtahDan, I don't know any LDS women that have careers outside of the usual traditional areas: teachers, nurses, etc.

So I can't comment on the way that they are treated.

[MikeWaters]

Originally Posted by ERCougar

Except for, at the end, she said it is between God and you.

Very un-mullah if you ask me.

I chose to ignore that part, if in fact, she actually said that.

[Archaea]

Originally Posted by MikeWaters

UtahDan, I don't know any LDS women that have careers outside of the usual traditional areas: teachers, nurses, etc.

So I can't comment on the way that they are treated.

We have lds phyisicans, entertainers, business women, entrepreneurs, and professors, but ignore reality. Of course, we live in a progressive society and you live in Texas.

[MikeWaters]

Originally Posted by Archaea

We have lds phyisicans, entertainers, business women, entrepreneurs, and professors, but ignore reality. Of course, we live in a progressive society and you live in Texas.

I'm just saying that I've never known any of these women.

There is one sister in College Station that is a professor. But I didn't know her very well.

The idea that masses of Mormon women are getting graduate education and pursuing careers at the expense of family is ridiculous, based on my experience.

[ERCougar]

Originally Posted by MikeWaters

I chose to ignore that part, if in fact, she actually said that.

As quoted by Levin: "These decisions are between you and the Lord. He knows the desires of your heart in your unique situation."

Now I will say that last sentence about "knowing the desires of your heart" is not the most innocuous way of putting it. But I'll choose to ignore that possible implication that "God knows why you're REALLY doing this and that it's all about you", as she didn't actually say that.