Leaving Kids in Hot Cars - Page 2 - cougarguard.com — unofficial BYU Cougars / LDS sports, football, basketball forum and message board

MikeWaters · 07-15-2008, 11:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RockyBalboa

So one has to have kids to be sympathetic and think it's not neglectful and abusive to leave a toddler in a boiling car?

bad stuff happens.

toddler who walks out of house at 5am and walks onto highway.

farrah's ward family toddler drowned in pool.

etc, etc.

Jeff Lebowski · 07-15-2008, 11:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MikeWaters

bad stuff happens.

toddler who walks out of house at 5am and walks onto highway.

farrah's ward family toddler drowned in pool.

etc, etc.

I know two fathers who backed over toddlers in the driveway, both resulting in deaths.

Jail time would have been cruel in this case. She will suffer enough.

MikeWaters · 07-15-2008, 11:11 PM

An example. On this last campout, I had a 16, 17, and 12 year old.

The 16 and 17 year old at about 9pm walked out of camp without telling me where they were going.

It was close to 11pm, and the thought occurred to me, that maybe they had gone swimming in one of the lakes. The thought of one or both of them drowning flashed through my mind. So I hustled out of camp looking for them. I never did find them. They came back to camp fine and dandy.

Nothing happened, but man, no one wants to live with it, if it does happen.

RockyBalboa · 07-15-2008, 11:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MikeWaters

bad stuff happens.

toddler who walks out of house at 5am and walks onto highway.

farrah's ward family toddler drowned in pool.

etc, etc.

While I agree with you...I think there's a difference between neglecting a child and leaving them in a boiling car and not knowing a toddler is behind them because they can't see them when they back out or because a kid comes out of nowhere and gets hit and the parent can't stop in time.

ERCougar · 07-15-2008, 11:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RockyBalboa

So one has to have kids to be sympathetic and think it's not neglectful and abusive to leave a toddler in a boiling car?

I think one has to have an iota of experience in raising children before one can make judgments about how neglectful or abusive it is to accidentally leave them in the car. So, yeah--I'll respect your opinion a lot more once you have kids.

I would be really hesitant to make judgments about situations that I have no experience with. Life has a way of turning things around on us; if you haven't figured this out, you either haven't lived very long or you're just not very self-aware.

Jeff Lebowski · 07-15-2008, 11:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ERCougar

I think one has to have an iota of experience in raising children before one can make judgments about how neglectful or abusive it is to accidentally leave them in the car. So, yeah--I'll respect your opinion a lot more once you have kids.

I would be really hesitant to make judgments about situations that I have no experience with. Life has a way of turning things around on us; if you haven't figured this out, you either haven't lived very long or you're just not very self-aware.

Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, humbles a person more than being a parent. Especially a parent of teenagers.

Gidget · 07-15-2008, 11:57 PM

I'm with ERCoug. It is hard to hear someone's judgment when they are not yet a parent. I used to think parenting mistakes could only be made by bad parents, but I know I am not a bad parent and I have had one or two, nothing fatal but they really made me think twice about judging others. I do think her forgetfulness is horrible and tragic, but not abuse in any way. And I do think jail time would have been cruel. Sometimes things just happen. Now, I don't think those "things" should happen all the time, but they do sometimes, and she will never go a day without feeling the pain-staking guilt everyone wants her to feel.

TripletDaddy · 07-16-2008, 12:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeff Lebowski

Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, humbles a person more than being a parent. Especially a parent of teenagers.

Based on all the karma I am sowing now, I can only imaging what my 3 teenagers are going to be like in 10 years.

The thing I have learned quickly by being a parent....you dont have time anymore to worry about what everyone else is or isnt doing. Your own hands are full enough.

Gidget · 07-16-2008, 12:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TripletDaddy

Based on all the karma I am sowing now, I can only imaging what my 3 teenagers are going to be like in 10 years.

The thing I have learned quickly by being a parent....you dont have time anymore to worry about what everyone else is or isnt doing. Your own hands are full enough.

Amen

RockyBalboa · 07-16-2008, 12:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ERCougar

I think one has to have an iota of experience in raising children before one can make judgments about how neglectful or abusive it is to accidentally leave them in the car. So, yeah--I'll respect your opinion a lot more once you have kids.

I would be really hesitant to make judgments about situations that I have no experience with. Life has a way of turning things around on us; if you haven't figured this out, you either haven't lived very long or you're just not very self-aware.

Okay so you've answered my question that,,,yes, in your mind, you have to be a parent in order to understand this. I strongly disagree with your opinion, but thanks for answering it nonetheless.

To me accidentally backing over a kid you didn't see...that's an accident. A kid who leaves out the back or frontdoor while everyone is asleep...that's an accident.

A kid that is left in a boiling car seat that the parent is clearly aware of......how do you categorize that?

07-15-2008, 11:57 PM	#17
Gidget Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: With Surfah Posts: 329	I'm with ERCoug. It is hard to hear someone's judgment when they are not yet a parent. I used to think parenting mistakes could only be made by bad parents, but I know I am not a bad parent and I have had one or two, nothing fatal but they really made me think twice about judging others. I do think her forgetfulness is horrible and tragic, but not abuse in any way. And I do think jail time would have been cruel. Sometimes things just happen. Now, I don't think those "things" should happen all the time, but they do sometimes, and she will never go a day without feeling the pain-staking guilt everyone wants her to feel. __________________ I am a philosophical Goldilocks, always looking for something neither too big nor too small, neither too hot nor too cold, something jussssst right. I'll send you a card from purgatory. - PaloAltoCougar Last edited by Gidget; 07-16-2008 at 12:02 AM.

07-15-2008, 11:11 PM	#13
MikeWaters Demiurge Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 36,365	An example. On this last campout, I had a 16, 17, and 12 year old. The 16 and 17 year old at about 9pm walked out of camp without telling me where they were going. It was close to 11pm, and the thought occurred to me, that maybe they had gone swimming in one of the lakes. The thought of one or both of them drowning flashed through my mind. So I hustled out of camp looking for them. I never did find them. They came back to camp fine and dandy. Nothing happened, but man, no one wants to live with it, if it does happen.