Any sex advice for me? - Page 3 - cougarguard.com — unofficial BYU Cougars / LDS sports, football, basketball forum and message board

non sequitur · 07-04-2006, 05:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Archaea

Be prepared to be disappointed, the both of you.

This may be the most unintentionally funny thing I have ever read on this site. The really sad thing, though, is the degree to which I agree with the sentiment. My advice to any young guy getting married would be to get in as much sex as possible when young, because the time will come when he'll need the likes of Henry Kissinger to broker a deal for marital sex.

CrazyHorse · 07-04-2006, 06:15 AM

Make sure she is ready... and then make her beg.

You will be happy you did it for the rest of your life.

Robin · 07-04-2006, 08:30 AM

I knew I was in trouble when Faith and I got to the room and she put in a CD of 'mood music.' It turned out to be "The Hokey Pokey."

Archaea · 07-04-2006, 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by non sequitur

This may be the most unintentionally funny thing I have ever read on this site. The really sad thing, though, is the degree to which I agree with the sentiment. My advice to any young guy getting married would be to get in as much sex as possible when young, because the time will come when he'll need the likes of Henry Kissinger to broker a deal for marital sex.

Where can I find Henry nowadays, I seem to have lost his number?

Velouria · 07-05-2006, 01:36 AM

I don't know who you are, but for the sake of your future wife, I decided to post some real advice. I am of course a woman. I am married. And I enjoy sex. Unfortunately, I know too many women who don't.

1. Know what the clitoris is and where to find it.
2. Now, that you know that, take your time at getting there. Concentrate on other body parts and save the best for last.
3. A vibrator is a good investment. It's fun, a bit naughty and a surefire way to help your wife climax.

Happy consummating!

Sleeping in EQ · 07-05-2006, 04:41 PM

In my opinion:

The sex talk works best in 3 parts:

1) you with a male figure you respect and will be comfortable asking candid questions.

2) Her with a female figure she respects and will be comfortable asking candid questions.

3) The two of you together with no one else around.

Dads or uncles are usually much better than moms at having this particular talk with sons. My dad pitched it as "the sex talk that all the others have been leading up to." We had it in the car driving up to the temple (four hours away) the day before the sealing. It was just the two of us and it was a great experience. A classic father-son moment.

Aunts, married cousins, or matrons of honor are usually much better than moms at having this particular talk with daughters. My wife is telling me this and I believe her.

The most important talk, though, will be between you and her. Sometime just before the wedding but not when the pressure is cranked up too high (a week or so before) invite her to talk about expectations, hopes, and fears. If she doesn't want to don't push too much. The idea is that you two should be able to talk about sex in an open, healthy way and you can reduce some of the wedding night anxiety for both of you.

On other matters:

Sometimes newly married LDS couples have difficulty going from 20 or so years of "sex is bad" to all of a sudden "sex is good." Try to relax and be forgiving. A little (maybe not too much) light humor works for some.

Being gentle and patient pays off. It shows confidence and care. Besides if you go for it you'll be done faster than that Luke Perry movie (8 seconds) and you're liable to hurt her besides. You might wanna try working through some trigonometry in your head...

Praise her and compliment her when she's doing something that feels just right (or that could with a little fine tuning). She's probably at least as anxious as you are and a boost to her self-esteem will help her feel beautiful and sexy.

Realize that in a sense sex is like skiing. Just because you've watched it on TV for years doesn't mean you're ready to take off down a black diamond on your first run. It's harder than it looks at first, but gets much easier with practice.

Experiment but do so with low expectations. It will take some time to discover what works for you two, but it's worth the ups and downs (pun!). There's nothing moral about prudery in marriage but you shouldn't feel pressured to be all exotic either. Take the time to figure out what you both like (at least initially). It's more fun if you don't get frustrated with each other (or with yourselves).

Most women's easiest orgasm is through the clitoris. There are usually other ways but they're pretty difficult for novices. Remember my skiing metaphor? You'll have a better time if you don't try to skip the bunny hill to go straight for the black diamond.

Have some KY Jelly or spray in your honeymoon bag. Buy it beforehand so you don't have to do some late night scramble to the drug store.

Unless she insists otherwise you should shower and do so first on your first night. It will allow her to make her entrance...

Have clean towels nearby. Sex with your wife isn't dirty but it can be umm...messy.

Try to have a relationship where you can talk about sex with your wife. Don't talk about sex with her with anyone else, but do talk about it with her in private.

Good luck.

UteStar · 07-08-2006, 02:43 AM

I remember the sex talk that I had with my parents before I got married. It consisted of, uh, uh, uh....nothing. Never had the talk.

But I did have a marriage sex talk with my fiance and the stake president. It was nice of him but a little awkward. Yes, I know that it is a spiritual experience but 20 minute discussion of it with a guy that I barely knew and a guy that my wife did not know at all was strange. I guess it was strange because we had no idea what he was going to talk to us about.

The best advice that I got though was from a friend that said to just talk about it when you are married. A lot of people are still embarrassed to even discuss it with the wife. Talk, discuss and have fun. The minute you don't talk about it and laugh and have fun is the minute that sex becomes a chore instead of an adventure.

BYUTexan · 01-27-2008, 08:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RockyBalboa

Take care of her needs first and the honey will flow like wine..........

or in your case, his

BYUTexan · 01-27-2008, 08:36 AM

this reminds me of that scene in the first American Pie movie where the father was trying to give a little sex education to his son and his son retorted: "Yes, Dad I know what a clitoris is."

ute4ever · 01-27-2008, 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mpfunk

My advice is that I hate you.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mpfunk

I hate everyone who is involved in this thread.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mpfunk

I hate you too on so many levels.

Jeez somebody needs to get laid already....

07-05-2006, 01:36 AM	#25
Velouria Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 1	Real advice I don't know who you are, but for the sake of your future wife, I decided to post some real advice. I am of course a woman. I am married. And I enjoy sex. Unfortunately, I know too many women who don't. 1. Know what the clitoris is and where to find it. 2. Now, that you know that, take your time at getting there. Concentrate on other body parts and save the best for last. 3. A vibrator is a good investment. It's fun, a bit naughty and a surefire way to help your wife climax. Happy consummating!

07-05-2006, 04:41 PM	#26
Sleeping in EQ Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: The People's Republic of Monsanto Posts: 3,085	A couple of things In my opinion: The sex talk works best in 3 parts: 1) you with a male figure you respect and will be comfortable asking candid questions. 2) Her with a female figure she respects and will be comfortable asking candid questions. 3) The two of you together with no one else around. Dads or uncles are usually much better than moms at having this particular talk with sons. My dad pitched it as "the sex talk that all the others have been leading up to." We had it in the car driving up to the temple (four hours away) the day before the sealing. It was just the two of us and it was a great experience. A classic father-son moment. Aunts, married cousins, or matrons of honor are usually much better than moms at having this particular talk with daughters. My wife is telling me this and I believe her. The most important talk, though, will be between you and her. Sometime just before the wedding but not when the pressure is cranked up too high (a week or so before) invite her to talk about expectations, hopes, and fears. If she doesn't want to don't push too much. The idea is that you two should be able to talk about sex in an open, healthy way and you can reduce some of the wedding night anxiety for both of you. On other matters: Sometimes newly married LDS couples have difficulty going from 20 or so years of "sex is bad" to all of a sudden "sex is good." Try to relax and be forgiving. A little (maybe not too much) light humor works for some. Being gentle and patient pays off. It shows confidence and care. Besides if you go for it you'll be done faster than that Luke Perry movie (8 seconds) and you're liable to hurt her besides. You might wanna try working through some trigonometry in your head... Praise her and compliment her when she's doing something that feels just right (or that could with a little fine tuning). She's probably at least as anxious as you are and a boost to her self-esteem will help her feel beautiful and sexy. Realize that in a sense sex is like skiing. Just because you've watched it on TV for years doesn't mean you're ready to take off down a black diamond on your first run. It's harder than it looks at first, but gets much easier with practice. Experiment but do so with low expectations. It will take some time to discover what works for you two, but it's worth the ups and downs (pun!). There's nothing moral about prudery in marriage but you shouldn't feel pressured to be all exotic either. Take the time to figure out what you both like (at least initially). It's more fun if you don't get frustrated with each other (or with yourselves). Most women's easiest orgasm is through the clitoris. There are usually other ways but they're pretty difficult for novices. Remember my skiing metaphor? You'll have a better time if you don't try to skip the bunny hill to go straight for the black diamond. Have some KY Jelly or spray in your honeymoon bag. Buy it beforehand so you don't have to do some late night scramble to the drug store. Unless she insists otherwise you should shower and do so first on your first night. It will allow her to make her entrance... Have clean towels nearby. Sex with your wife isn't dirty but it can be umm...messy. Try to have a relationship where you can talk about sex with your wife. Don't talk about sex with her with anyone else, but do talk about it with her in private. Good luck. __________________ "Do not despise the words of prophets, but test everything; hold fast to what is good; " 1 Thess. 5:21 (NRSV) We all trust our own unorthodoxies. Last edited by Sleeping in EQ; 07-05-2006 at 04:48 PM.

07-04-2006, 06:15 AM	#22
CrazyHorse Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 39	Make sure she is ready... and then make her beg. You will be happy you did it for the rest of your life.

07-04-2006, 08:30 AM	#23
Robin Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 961	I knew I was in trouble when Faith and I got to the room and she put in a CD of 'mood music.' It turned out to be "The Hokey Pokey."

07-08-2006, 02:43 AM	#27
UteStar Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 1,817	I remember the sex talk that I had with my parents before I got married. It consisted of, uh, uh, uh....nothing. Never had the talk. But I did have a marriage sex talk with my fiance and the stake president. It was nice of him but a little awkward. Yes, I know that it is a spiritual experience but 20 minute discussion of it with a guy that I barely knew and a guy that my wife did not know at all was strange. I guess it was strange because we had no idea what he was going to talk to us about. The best advice that I got though was from a friend that said to just talk about it when you are married. A lot of people are still embarrassed to even discuss it with the wife. Talk, discuss and have fun. The minute you don't talk about it and laugh and have fun is the minute that sex becomes a chore instead of an adventure.

01-27-2008, 08:36 AM	#29
BYUTexan Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: the 903 part of Texas Posts: 286	this reminds me of that scene in the first American Pie movie where the father was trying to give a little sex education to his son and his son retorted: "Yes, Dad I know what a clitoris is."