10-28-2008, 03:59 AM | #101 |
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10-28-2008, 04:07 AM | #102 | |
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It's not the focus of the book as it is simply addressed in one chapter. It's a book written by a professional for a lay audience, a very prudish one at that.
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10-28-2008, 04:13 AM | #103 | |
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Then, within the oval, he drew a small circle and said, "This is your world of acceptable sexual behavior. It includes holding hands, and hugs and kisses of affection, but not of passion. Beyond that, you jump straight to outside the oval." But then he and his wife talked to us about how great sex is, and how, even though it's often very difficult, it's worth the wait. I used that approach a lot while I was bishop, and I had young marrieds talk to the youth, essentially to confirm that (i) sex is really, really good, and (ii) it's best if one plays by the rules and waits for the right person and time. Given that, statistically, devout churchgoers (of any denomination) report more satisfying sex lives than those who don't go, I don't buy the notion that, on balance, religion promotes unhealthy hangups. I know it happens, but it's unfair to conclude faith hinders, rather than promotes, a healthy sex life. That said, while wading through this thread I couldn’t get Marvin Gaye’s “Sexual Healing” out of my head. |
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10-28-2008, 04:15 AM | #104 |
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I haven't read through the 11 pages of comments, so maybe I'm just redundant. Does the church have an overly prudish approach to sex? Definitely. Do most churches? Certainly.
At the same time, sex is just a tough thing to negotiate in a relationship. I've done a lot of pre-marriage and couples counseling and couples from all walks of life have trouble synchronizing their sexuality. It's not unique to Mormons or Christians or anybody. It's a human problem. The church could do lots of things better to address sex; that is clear. But to think that outside of the church that it's some sort of panacea of women without any sexual inhibitions is just plain silly.
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Tobias: You know, Lindsay, as a therapist, I have advised a number of couples to explore an open relationship where the couple remains emotionally committed, but free to explore extra-marital encounters. Lindsay: Well, did it work for those people? Tobias: No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but...but it might work for us. |
10-28-2008, 04:23 AM | #105 | |
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10-28-2008, 04:24 AM | #106 | |
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10-28-2008, 04:48 AM | #107 | |
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I'd be remiss if I didn't recount a recent conversation I had in the foyer with a gentleman in my ward. The ward temple visit was switched from Saturday night to Saturday morning. We did this to accommodate the many mid-singles in our ward who wanted to go to the temple on Saturday morning so they could party on Saturday night. Anyways, a 50-year old gentleman approached me to say we shouldn't have switched ward temple night. His words: "I'm a sex therapist, and I bet you couldn't guess when couples are most likely to have sex: Saturday morning. So I strongly suggest that we switch the temple visit back to Saturday night." I smile and nod, and think, "Riiiight. I'll bring that up in the next ward council meeting."
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10-28-2008, 10:45 AM | #108 | ||
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No kidding. |
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10-28-2008, 01:25 PM | #109 | |
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If I may borrow from TripleD.......rowrr!
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10-28-2008, 01:31 PM | #110 |
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What would your curriculum look like
when teaching the YM and YW of the Church?
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