Taking our your own endowment in the temple

[marsupial]

I remember feeling anxious during the endowment. I was worried that I was doing everything wrong, that I was going to screw up in the ceremony, etc. My mother, who was supposed to be helping me, left me hanging for most of the ceremony. Some stranger the row behind me finally took pity on me and helped.

It didn't get better the second time I went as I was met with rudeness by one of the matrons. Danimal and I had been married for just a couple of weeks. I didn't know where I was supposed to go once I got dressed because 1) it was the first time I had ever been to the Provo temple; 2) it was my first time going through for someone else and 3) it was the first time I had ever been without an escort showing me around.

I asked a temple matron where I was suppose to go next. She answered abruptly, "perhaps if you attended the temple more frequently, you would remember where you are suppose to be." I had been endowed a whopping 2 weeks! Her rudeness was surprising to me because all I ever heard was how wonderful the temple is, how it is the celestial kingdom on earth, how everyone is the same in the temple, no one is judged and how there are so many people there to help you, blah, blah blah... She made me feel stupid and defensive.

I also have issues with separating the sexes and the women covering their faces. I asked the Memphis temple president about this once when I saw him in the celestial room. He couldn't give me a good answer. If anyone has any insight, I'd love to hear it.

Getting to the temple is difficult. Temple dates suck. It is a great expense and effort to get a babysitter and then to spend the whole date on the other side of the room as your spouse unable to talk to or touch each other? It's a tough sell. I do like BlueK's perspective of it being the purest form of religion. I need to go back and take that attitude with me and see if it improves my experience.

I think it would've helped me if the covenants I was making were outlined in the temple prep class.

[MikeWaters]

Here is a thought that I bet is common:

"Since I didn't have the greatest experience in the temple ceremony, there is something wrong with me. Maybe I am unworthy or flawed or just don't have the capacity to 'get it'."

When you think of the potentially lifelong impact of being a "temple Mormon" versus a "non-temple Mormon", it is frankly bizarre how we don't prepare people. As in stupendously head-scratching.

Of course, this is a church where asking for a suggestion box is likely to get you a nice industrial-carpet static shock as you get within arm's length of the ark.

Members vote with their feet. And temples that serve as catchment for tens of thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of members stand underutilized. No doubt, most of us have been pressured to go to the temple, in one way or another. Guilt trips are common. "No one is attending ward temple night." Or other more direct intreaties.

We shouldn't need to be persuaded through these means. It should be like Lehi's dream, an opportunity to taste of the fruit of the tree of life. And I believe it is actually like that for a lot of members. But for other members, hearing from these people is mystifying. And always non-specific and sometimes grandiose.

[BlueK]

Originally Posted by marsupial

It didn't get better the second time I went as I was met with rudeness by one of the matrons. Danimal and I had been married for just a couple of weeks. I didn't know where I was supposed to go once I got dressed because 1) it was the first time I had ever been to the Provo temple; 2) it was my first time going through for someone else and 3) it was the first time I had ever been without an escort showing me around.

I asked a temple matron where I was suppose to go next. She answered abruptly, "perhaps if you attended the temple more frequently, you would remember where you are suppose to be." I had been endowed a whopping 2 weeks! Her rudeness was surprising to me because all I ever heard was how wonderful the temple is, how it is the celestial kingdom on earth, how everyone is the same in the temple, no one is judged and how there are so many people there to help you, blah, blah blah... She made me feel stupid and defensive.

The response you got from that temple worker is inexcusable. I hate to draw lines in the church, but it does tend to illustrate to me what the 3-hour block type of mormon mentality is to me. It's task focused and judgmental with a generous helping of guilt, rather than covenant focused. Anyone in the proper spirit would be helpful, welcoming and not judgmental. Almost all temple workers usually are. I'm sorry you experienced that there, but that person probably makes similar comments to people in church.

[MikeWaters]

Originally Posted by BlueK

The response you got from that temple worker is inexcusable. I hate to draw lines in the church, but it does tend to illustrate to me what the 3-hour block type of mormon mentality is to me. It's task focused and judgmental with a generous helping of guilt, rather than covenant focused. Anyone in the proper spirit would be helpful, welcoming and not judgmental. Almost all temple workers usually are. I'm sorry you experienced that there, but that person probably makes similar comments to people in church.

Marsupial needs to review Elder Bednar's talk on taking offence.

Of course, I am evil, I might have said "**** you, I come as often as I can" to her and watched her jaw drop.