I signed up to play on my buddy's soccer team
 

I don't know why.

I hate soccer. I don't watch it, and the last time I played it was probably 6th grade recess.

They're going to regret asking me to play, I don't even know the rules.

all you have to know is which way the ball needs to be kicked.

Just don't get hurt, as you know it would be a bad time to get hurt before the Relay.

The only injury I see possible is my team beating me with their fists after I lose them yet another game.

actually soccer is much more dangerous than basketball, IMO.

Slide tackles, heads colliding, etc.

In this league you can't leave your feet. Of course, a lot of good that rule will do me after some doofus has taken out my knee. But I think the league is geared more toward the wannabe crowd, such as myself.

never go for contested headers. I learned this the hard way.

In our local paper this morning there was an update on a HS kid who broke his neck and almost died after having someone run into him when he was playing goalie. I guess he slid down to get the ball while some other player was also sliding for the ball. He took a knee to the neck and fractured it fairly high in the C Spine from what I understand.

I've got a patient right now that snapped his Achilles tendon chasing a ball playing adult league soccer. He was a weekend warrior who was once in great shape, but had really let himself go and had no business playing competitively.

Is he a quad now? I'd think I would have seen him if he was and I've never heard this story.