A Proper Introduction
 

I am attached to Sleepy. He doesn't really sleep in Elder's Quorum--he's been in the primary for years.

Anyway, I look around the site once in a while and thought I'd post a little. Sleepy took me to BYU football games until I understood the rules and that it wasn't just meatballs smashing into each other.

I love music and books and I design my own clothes and handbags. If I can figure out how to get one of those picture thingies on the side I'll put up a picture of Daniel Craig.

I'll write more a little later. It's time to take my son to storytime!

Welcome to the board! Slowly but surely, we're increasing the number of female participants.

Welcome!

Your husband is a great poster. I look forward to getting to know you as well.

surely you are not including SU as one.

Welcome to the board. Where is RS? Is that short for a state, city or country.

You mean all of these mammary and masturbatory threads haven't scared off new female posters?

you mean SeattleUte or SoonerUte?

I miss Soup and Farrah, btw. How come people have to, you know, have actually lives and stuff to do and such? :)

SIRS, welcome, I hope you'll hang around. Storytime is, IMO, part of the glue that holds this country together.

Republic of Serbia.

Relief Society.

EQ - Elder's Quorum
RS - Relief Society

Welcome.

Like the rest of us wretched males here, I'll assume that SIEQ has married over his head.

We testosterone types are grateful to have such lovely females in our presence.

As one of the few members of this board who has been to both, the biggest difference between the two is that usually the folks in Relief Society have better dental hygiene practices and results than the folks in Republic of Serbia...although there is something about the random lobbing of mortar rounds by Paleozoic Period artillery weapons that could intimidate dentists out of opening their offices.

Saying that replace "Muslim" with "men" and I think the pissing and moaning would be similar.

So in my best Kresimir Cosic accent: Stali ali putsan!

Given the epidemic of LDS Scando chicks thinking the Allmighty shortchanged them a bit in the ol squeezebox, I will say that the ta-tas are a bit more bodacious in Relief Society. Now if we could just get away from our stifling Victorianism and flaunt what we got, bay-beeeee!

I fully support this notion. Hey, that would make you match with your husband's avatar.

Welcome to the board!

desperately needs Barbara Gordon's help to decipher this passage.

Back in the day the Turks conquered the Slavic area. Per your religion, as it was intepreted and enforced back in that day, if one converts to Islam they are legally allowed to continue to own their property. Ergo many of the landowners in Bosnia-Herczegovenia joined up. They became Slavic Muslims. By all means these folks are not exactly bucking to join Al Queda, they are far too European. This also means their teethe suck gray used SE Idaho irrigation canal water. So when a little fight broke out that way when Izetebegovic, Milosivic and some Croat whose name I forgot sought to fill the political vaccuum left by the dead Tito, these folks used the most familiar mobilizing tool in that region, nationalism. The Serbs hate the Muslims for nationalistic reasons, but the root is po folk always hate rich folk.

As far as my mysogenistic hooters allusions, your people are not allowed to do that. IMO it is the biggest reason I support the war in Iraq...it is all about ensuring voluptuous cracks where needed in Eye-Rack!

okay,some points has been emerged . i hate to ask so much ,but what your support of iraq war has to do with serbs hate muslims?

I support the war in Iraq because it will bring the liberating breast augmentations to the middle east. I believe that John the Revelator outlines that as one of the final steps before Gog and Magog square off for all the temporal marbles........

Many thanks for your unique blend of clarity and perspective. What, pray tell, are the other "final steps"? What must we as loyal CG'ers do to prepare?

Come now Requiem, you are "of the House," despite your choice to play with the girls up north. You well know I won't know the details until the Gospel Doctrine teacher tells me when we get to Johns trip to Kolob aided by mild hallucinogenics....Get back to me sometime in December.

That said, I do think the University of Utah winning an outright conference championship in football was one of the signs. That happened on a chilly afternoon during the dark years of Gary Crowton. Get ready to pack up and move to Missouri honeychild!

This has quickly turned into one of the greatest threads ever.

SIRS, I hope you don't take offense that we've hijacked your very first thread around here. That's pretty much just what we do.


Mindful, I wrote this earlier then decided to hold off. But in case you haven't figured it out:

Goat is proud to be an American, where if divine intervention doesn't provide us the nicest breasts in the world, surgical intervention will. And in what can only be attributed to selfless idealism on his part, he wishes this kind of freedom for all the women of the world.

He's somewhat concerned that the Mormons occasionally encourage attire a little too burqa-like for their women... After all, he only wants to admire all the beauty that is God's creation. And surely shopping at Victoria's Secret every once in a while never hurt anyone, anyhow.

I prefer your Gospel Doc lessons - esp. the lack of self serving and bloated questions/comments from the old goat section. Will there be a CG contingent clothed in the royal red robes on the Mizzou walk and can we stop at BG's manse for appropriate libation?

hey, you mean me? Sure! Take a right on I-35 and you can't miss me.

What's the drink of choice?

Goat had it almost right - Kolobade with mild hallucinogenics. Recipe must be in a prior issue of Bon Appetit. Do you have shoe stores nearby?

Am I the only hearing "Oh Beautiful for patriot's dreams that sees beyond the Zoobs? Thine alabaster cities gleam adorned with man made boobs?"

This is why I nobly put my life on the line for ma and apple pie!

Your red blooded big knocker loving men can thank me.......

yes, for men. But this is oklahoma - once you cross into the state all women are required to be barefoot and preferably with child. So no Nine West stores around here. Sorry.

A place where boots are still in style for manly footwear......

Save for you fetchin' habitual cheaters, I would be down with your state.

Goat, you are the man! Well done!

All we need now is an Islamic version of the Kama Sutra, and Muslim augmentors and we'd be set.

I'd like my hallicenagens with some maryjane please.

Goatnapper and Mindful just had the best exchange in CG history. The fact that is was serious made it even better. I honestly can not stop laughing.

Thank you for providing me with the best signature out there...

Thank you for the warm "Hi" everyone. I take it that MindfulCoug is Muslim? Cool.

Even better than Muslim, she lives in Iran. Very cool participant that I hope understands my sarcasm. Seriously, she would love the lovely Sister Goatnapper who would be an Elder Bednar poster child. Not only did Sister Goatnapper graduate from the Why-Aye, but she has yet to get either ear pierced once!

Is her navel pierced?

Go straight for the good stuff. Does she have augmentations?

None of that whatsoever. Very conservative folk, us Goatnappers. I even wear a white shirt every sunday.

That snap you heard was the preconceptions of Cougarguarders far and wide crumbling to the ground.

The internet is my id. Well that and the oppressive concerned with a lilly white appearance nature of mormon culture drives me to it.

That's not possible as you are not a Utah Mormon.

You California Mormons just can't let us Utahns have our moment in the sun, can you?