Is there anything that Steven Seagal cannot do?
 

It is about time that a fat guy with a ponytail brought us an Asian Experience through an energy drink.
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I can think of one thing he can't do:

Go an entire movie without eventually kicking the bad guy in the head or body.

I can think of another: act.

What you mean you were not stirred to tears when in On Deadly Ground he asked us "How do you change the essence of man." My life has never been the same since seeing that powerhouse acting performance.

I remember seeing something that evaluated the top celebrity actors, and it included some sort of evaluation of their acting talent. I recall Steven Seagal being in a class by himself - far distant from the worst of the rest.

He's ok but he's no Chuck Norris.

Jack Bauer would kick his ass, and do it while tied up, gagged and blindfolded in a helicopter.