ADAM - Slow Down and Enjoy the Ride
Adam, we met in person a few years ago as you may recall, and I think you are a fine person. I do, however, marvel at the number and intensity of your posts. Though I do not post here much anymore due to time constraints, I do check out the site nearly every day. The reason I marvel at your posts is that I see a lot of me in you and what appear to be your current attitudes. I say that I see a lot of me, but I guess what I mean is not me right now, but that I see a lot of me from about 5-10 years ago.
I perceive you are not at peace with yourself internally based on feelings of betrayal that you feel towards the church and its leaders. You want the chruch to stop covering up things and do things the way you want them to be done so that the reason for the creation of angst between you and the church will not be there for others to have to go through later. Perhaps there is a bit of pride inside that compels you to want to make the church admit to things that have caused you paid (a la Danzig). I do not know what you really feel, but these are feelings I had back when, and you appear to be acting outwardly very much like I used to a number of years ago so I am assuming the cause of those symptoms is similar.
Let me tell you what I realized. I realized that no matter how imperfect people governing the church are, that the church is an awfully beautiful thing. It is nearly perfect despite its imperfections, IMO. Though it is (improperly IMO) so much more to so many people, the church is nothing more than a school ground for spiritual infants/children. The church is great with the basics and the actual doctrine of Christ (ie, faith, repentance, baptism and the GotHG). The purpose of this school ground is to help individuals attain spriritual adulthood, wherein they are prophets unto themselves. When people attain spiritual adulthood they do not then shun the church as something that is no longer needed or important, rather they embrace it for what it is, a tool to help their spiritually infantile brothers and sisters come up higher.
When you become a spiritual adult, that does not give you authority outside of your stewardship. You are responsible for you and your family and maybe some others entrusted under your care. It is not for you to personally and publicly attempt to right the ship by belittleing local and general authorities of the church. First, unless you are in their position with full knowledge about relevant circumstances that they have as well as the weight of their respective mantles upon you, you may just be kicking against the pricks and saying you would handle or say something one way, when in reality, with full understanding of context, you may act the same way.
I am sure you have not forgotten that the church is not a democracy. Common consent is involved, therefore you have a chance to vote against certain individuals. Yes, I understand the apparent futility thereof, but if enough people like you banded together ... it is like Batman in Batman Begins when he said "now there are two of us." It is not for you to 'steady the ark' through public belittlement of your local and general leaders. Whether you like them or not, they are 'the Lord's annointed.' You may want to think twice before raising your heel against them and follow David's example relative to Saul. The moment someone becomes a public spectacle (ie, Danzig) through attempts at steadying the ark, it should be no suprise that they have to be dealt with.
I realize the church PR people could use more tact at times and deal with things differently, but I leave them to do what they think is best. Life is too short. Enjoy it. Unless the voice of God calls you as one mighty and strong, it is not your job to steady the ark. Focus your time and talent, instead, on using the great virtue of the church and free service of individuals therein to help raise the spirituality of your brothers and sisters.
I have seen many people in the apparently unsettled spiritual condition that you appear to be in. I, as I said, was there myself. Many such people go down a road eventually that does not include the church in their lives. I think that is sad because I still believe that the church is the best organization in the world, despite its faults. I am a believer. I still have issues I deal with but I have learned to enjoy the grace of the church and focus on myself and my stewardship, rather than unproductive sabre rattling that usually leads to bitterness. I am not saying there is no room for healthy debate. Not at all. But with your tenacious and unsettled daily complaints (and you are certainly free to continue doing so), you may find more peace enjoying the beauty of the now, and focusing on the micro level of what you can do, rather than the macro level where you have no stewardship.
These are just some thoughts I have had over the past months relative to some of your posts that I have read. I hope they are not offensive to you as I am not calling you out. In fact, I intended for this to be a private message at first, but I think some things said herein should be made available for others to hear. Whether my words do any good or not is yet to be seen, and is somewhat beside the point, as I am merely writing words that I have felt moved to write.
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