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-   -   Stuff White People Like (http://www.cougarguard.com/forum/showthread.php?t=16902)

Venkman 02-18-2008 02:31 AM

Stuff White People Like
 
someone posted this on cb. Some of it was pretty good.

http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/

il Padrino Ute 02-18-2008 02:40 AM

That is an outstanding avatar.

malapert 02-19-2008 04:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Venkman (Post 186051)
someone posted this on cb. Some of it was pretty good.

Some of it was pretty good, I agree. :D

JohnnyLingo 02-19-2008 07:41 AM

If someone started a blog named "What Black People Like," there's a 100% chance if would be attacked as racist within a day.

I'm not offended by the White People blog, btw.

marsupial 02-19-2008 02:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JohnnyLingo (Post 186479)
If someone started a blog named "What Black People Like," there's a 100% chance if would be attacked as racist within a day.

I'm not offended by the White People blog, btw.

Yes, but what would the content be? Given the jokes I have heard about "what black people like," I don't think a similar blog would portray them as coffee-drinking, tree-hugging, beach-loving, indie rock fans. It would likely be more denigrating and therefore racist.

Reading over the list, danimal and I are guilty as charged. We like so many things on the list and got a few good chuckles out of the site.

Archaea 02-19-2008 05:42 PM

Somebody went for the heart:

Quote:

A good place to find white people on a Saturday is at a Bike Shop. Bike shops are almost entirely staffed and patronized by white people! But not all white people love bicycles in the same way, there is much diversity. First up, we have the younger urban white folks who absolutely love their fixed gear bicycles. These are seen all over college towns, Silverlake in LA, Williamsburg in Brooklyn, Queen West in Toronto, and Victoria, British Columbia. Fixed gear bicycles meet a lot of requirements for white person acceptance. They can be made from older (i.e. vintage) bicycles, thus allowing the rider to have a unique bike that is unlikely to be ridden by anyone else in town. They are also easily customizable with expensive things Aerospoke rims, Phil Wood Hubs, and Nitto Parts. The combination of rare bicycles and expensive parts makes it easy for white people to judge other white people on the quality and originality of their bicycles. This is important in determining if someone is or isn’t cooler than you.
White people also like Mountain Bikes because it lets them be in nature. It’s really not more complicated than that.
And finally, they love expensive Road Bikes and the accompanying spandex uniforms. This enables http://bikeportland.org/wp-content/jorgOlifBike.jpgthem to ride long distances and wear really tight clothes without any social stigmas. These types of riders will spend upwards of $5,000 on a bicycle and up to $400 on accessories, but will not ride to work. Perhaps because they cannot wear the spandex. It is important that you never question why someone needs a $5000 bicycle since the answer is always “performance.”
For the most part, these rules have been unisex. But there is a special category of bicycles that appeal far more to white women, the European city bike (pictured). White women have a lot of fantasies about idealized lives, and one of them is living in Europe and riding around an old city on one of these bikes. They dream about waking up and riding to a little cafe, then visiting bakeries and cheese shops and finally riding home to prepare a fancy meal for their friends who will all eat under a canopy with white Christmas lights. This information can be used to help gain the trust/admiration of a white woman, especially if you can pull off a lie about how your mother told you about how she used to do all of these things when she was younger.
And of course, it goes without saying that white people who ride bikes like to talk about how they are saving the earth. If you know a person who rides to work, you should take them aside and say “Hey, thanks. Sincerely, The Earth.” Then give a thumbs up. That white person will ride home on a cloud.

creekster 02-19-2008 05:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Archaea (Post 186524)
Somebody went for the heart:


Yea, that one hurt a bit, but I have to say I was pleased to note that riding to work, which I sometimes do, removes this white guy from the geekiest part of that category.

Archaea 02-19-2008 05:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by creekster (Post 186526)
Yea, that one hurt a bit, but I have to say I was pleased to note that riding to work, which I sometimes do, removes this white guy from the geekiest part of that category.

I don't ride to save the environment, I ride because I like it.

malapert 02-19-2008 05:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Archaea (Post 186527)
I don't ride to save the environment, I ride because I like it.

My wife says that to me all the time.

creekster 02-19-2008 05:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Archaea (Post 186527)
I don't ride to save the environment, I ride because I like it.

That's not really the point. The point is that you blow the dough and then don't use it for anmything practical. I don't ride to save the envirnment either. I ride becasue I llike it, and it azlso gets me to and from work as often as possible. No biggie. I was just trying but once again failing to be funny


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