I know a high school basketball coach who exposed his genitals to our basketball team on the court, and said something extremely vulgar and sexual, and now he's a stake president.

But I don't think he got disciplined, so I guess that doesn't count.

I guess my point is this: The problem with Church discipline is that only the people who confess (or get tattled on) end up getting disciplined.

So ultimately, you end up with dishonest scoundrels in charge sometimes, when honest, "confessing scoundrels" might actually be more "worthy."

I thought Majerus wasn't a member.

This guy was also bald, but not quite so fat. He was a great guitar player, too. He played the guitar for my 10 year reunion, which I missed, because of traumatic memories.

But the same concept applies to the missionary work force. Since masturbation is so strictly forbidden, you end up with a legion of dishonest missionaries who claim to have never masturbated in their lives.

My parents always told me to lie on the masturbation questions anyway.

Also, I was getting those questions 3 years before my first pubic hair sprouted.

Serious question. Do you feel like your parents telling you to lie on those questions and you lying on those questions (if you did) hurt your outlook on the church or your spirituality in general? This is something I'm facing as my kids get older and I am leaning towards an approach like your parents.

What? You're an MD/PhD and you skipped your reunion?

You missed all the fun...you get to see how many of the old BMOCs are now balding car salesmen.

I guess it depends on one's definition of "spirituality."

Personally, I think the guilt that teenagers feel when they aren't taught to be philosophical is much more spiritually damaging than my family's approach to these issues.

My dad always said: "It's normal for adolescent males to masturbate. But it can become a problem as well, if it's taken to an extreme. You shouldn't feel guilty about it, and if you ever have any kind of problem, I'd want you to feel comfortable enough to come talk to me about it first."

And I'm also one of the very last heterosexuals who has yet to reproduce.

Maybe I'll go to the 15 year or 20 year reunion, once I have some offspring.

I had a professor at BYU say masturbating was not a sin, but rather us allowing telestial bodies control our celestial spirits. I am not quite sure what that meant. But it makes me feel better. :D

My favorite question was posed by my stake president just before my mission:

"Have you masturbated WITHIN THE LAST THREE MONTHS?"

I said: "That's a new one."